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How to give the most to your most important relationships during the holidays.

It is quite counterintuitive when you think about understanding the need to pull away from people for a period of time, in order to give your best to people for a period of time. Life demands a certain ebb and flow.

The level of busyness is steadily increasing as Christmas draws nearer and people all over the globe prepare to celebrate the birth of The Saviour of the World! All around you, traffic is thickening, on busy highways as well as in stores, drive thru lines are getting longer, and stress levels are climbing as that critical virtue called patience seems to be fading little by little. In times like this, It is really important to remember just how small the negative is in comparison to the positive. It may not feel that way, but I promise you it is absolutely true. As the old saying goes, don’t sweat the small stuff…and it’s all small stuff! Well, to be accurate, all is small except a few things, one of which is RELATIONSHIPS. Relationships are huge, and they are inescapable. It can be extremely sobering to imagine life without some of the people we love, lean on and trust in most, and though that thought can be painful, it can also be very beneficial in helping you keep the main thing the main thing.

Relationships are the essence of our connectedness, and they indeed belong at the top of our priority list, but please do all that you can to ensure that you don’t get so focused on serving others (in relationships) that you neglect the two relationships that are most important…relationship with your Creator and yourself.

There is not much you can pour into others when the cup you’re pouring from is almost empty.

Here is a great example of proper relationship management, and it is modeled for us by Jesus.

Matthew 14:23 ESV

And after he had dismissed the crowds, he went up on the mountain by himself to pray. When evening came, he was there alone,

When your two most important relationship are properly aligned and maintained, your reach(influence/impact) can be extraordinary.

It is essential that you FIND TIME FOR SOLITUDE.

Solitude is that prioritized time when you intentionally pull away from others to be alone, to be refueled, and to be refocused. There will always be one more thing to do and one more person who needs you. Give yourself permission to say no to one more and yes to necessary solitude.

Here are a few benefits from Solitude.

Acknowledgment of your limitations

It is essential to have a sober and modest assessment of yourself (humility), understanding that you are not all-sufficient, but whatever you are able to give to others must first be given to you by a higher source (your Creator). In other words, you go to The Source to be re-sourced, only then can you become a resource (not a Source), but a resource to others. It is dangerous when others see you as their source when all you are is a resource.

Gain Awareness

The constant pull from others, self, and the environment around you can gradually cause you to miss simple truth, yield to negative thoughts and the voices of critics. No one is exempt from this reality. Maintain a high level of awareness.


As raindrops on a windshield impact the drivers view, so life’s circumstances and challenges impact your view and decisions. Clarity is a must for all who navigate this journey called life. Solitude and prayer can help bring great clarity.

It is impossible to give what you have not first received, and to keep giving requires that you keep refilling repeatedly. Prioritize Solitude so that you can continue to prioritize others.

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Merry Christmas!

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